Ask Beth: Does Size REALLY Matter?

Posted by Beth Darling on Feb 3rd 2022

Dear Beth Darling,

Before we got together, my girlfriend dated a mutual friend for several years and he was “very well endowed”. I’m afraid that I can’t possibly satisfy her, even though she claims I do. So, please, tell me, do you think she’s lying? Does size really matter even though she says it doesn’t?

Brad R.

Dear Brad,

You know I’ll always be real with you, so here’s the truth:

  • First, I have no idea if your GF is lying about whether you satisfy her or not, but if she doesn't generally lie, I think you should trust her.
  • Second, yes, penis size matters- but probably not as much as you think, or in the ways that you think.

To begin, it might help you to know that the average size of an erect penis is approx 5 - 5.5 inches. And that about 90% of men fall within this range.

That being said, different shapes and sizes have different appeals and drawbacks to different people, just like the size of a woman’s breasts.

Generally what we care about when it comes to sexy is what we do with our “assets” and how things feel. So for example, with respect to a woman giving oral pleasure, I’ve yet to have a woman upset about an “average” size penis. When it comes to penis in vagina penetrative intercourse, your GF probably wants to feel a certain sense of fullness when you’re inside her. But what that means to her is anyone’s guess. Some women like length, others don’t enjoy their cervix being pounded. A woman might prefer thickness, others prefer not to be stretched so much. Perhaps, “average” means very workable, or maybe a unique curve hits just the right spot.

The truth is - while size and shape matter, the more important factors are how y’all play together and find pleasure in each other’s bodies. More truth? Bigger isn’t always better in bed. Not only can a big penis cause a woman pain during penetration, but it can also be harder for a man to maintain an erection because of the blood flow required. Sadly, there are big, strong men who almost pass out during penetrative sex and that is NOT sexy. Plus, an average or smaller penis can actually be preferable for anal sex.

Hope you feel better and use your skills and love to fully satisfy her!

Beth Darling